Wednesday, September 22, 2010

The Torturous G-Men

Hello Giants fans! Guess what? WE ARE IN FIRST PLACE!!

... by half a game... Again...

still, this is an achievement (for the third time) and the Giants have done a great job coming back from being down 6.5 games of the Padres to be in a position to control their own destiny. As confusing as its been this season to see exactly why the Padres have been so good, the reason the Giants are in this position is much easier to spot.

In the past 17 games, the Giants have held opponents to 3 runs or less.

This week I'm going to give you all what I believe are some of the Giants' pitching staff's superpowers and how they will help us reach the postseason in what I've called:


Big Time Timmy Jim

Real Name: Tim Lincecum
Height: 5-11
Weight: 170 lbs
Super Power: The Shapeshifting Changeup

2 time Cy Young Winner, and Ace of this starting rotation, you all know him and love him. Although the key to his success is a well placed fastball, his finishing move is the changeup. Hovering around 85 mph, the changeup appears exactly like his fastball out of his delivery making hitters believe that the ball 'shapeshifts' from fastball to breaking ball right before their eyes.


Real Name: Gerald Posey
Height: 6-1
Weight: 205 lbs
Super Power: Power Pickoff

He's won a lot of games with his bat, (yesterday in particular) and shown his poise behind the dish, but what's super about Buster is cutting down the running game. His ability to get the ball out of his glove and gun it to the 2nd baseman is amazing. For a staff like the Giants who aren't particularly good at holding runners on 1st, Buster has become a rock-solid insurance policy. Just try and run on him I dare you...

Shotgun Cain

Real Name: Matt Cain
Height: 6-3
Weight: 230 lbs
Super Power: The Elevator

Easily the most consistent starter in the second half for the Giants, Matt Cain has been our workhorse and just gives the team a chance to win. The Giants are 11-2 in games he has started since July 17. His power is the Elevator fastball. Although not built as a strikeout pitcher, when Cainer needs a swing and a miss, he reaches back and blows a fastball right by the letters. It is a ruthless way to destroy a hitter... and make no mistake, Cain shows no mercy

No-No Sanchez

Real Name: Jonathan Sanchez
Height: 6'2
Weight: 189 lbs
Super Power: The Disappearing Fastball

Probably the most surprising stars of this pitching staff is Sanchez who has been the picture of consistency this month allowing only 2 runs in the month of September for a 2-1 record and a 0.82 ERA in his last 5 starts. His special move is the Disappearing Fastball which for some reason hitters cannot pick up on despite only going 91-92 mph. The deception in his arm angle and slot makes the fastball appear faster than it is, and hitters swing right through it.


Real Name: Brian Wilson
Height: 6'1
Weight: 195 lbs
Super Power: Fireball

Detractors all point to his high WHIP and Heart Attack risk, but he has been the backbone of this Giant's bullpen which has been hitting its stride at exactly the right time. His best pitch is his fastball, and as I've seen with my own eyes, it has hit 99 mph. What's even more amazing is watching him start the 9th hitting 93 on the gun and ending it hitting 98. When he blows past a batter with a Fireball to end the game there is only one word to describe it... Domination.

There are other members of the Torturous G-Men, whom I have left out, but you can help me out and include them in the comments. Lets ride this out baby, 9 games to go!

Laws of the Day

Every game is MUST win.


  1. I'd watched a Cain starter, Wilson closer game any day of the week! Combined with Posey, I'm betting they help take us all the way:)

  2. Like I told you earlier... gotta spread the runs around! It seems like we don't win when we don't hit home runs... so either be more productive at the plate or just hit multiple home runs every game! Not too much to ask imo ;p